Part III // Hurt vs Harm
Please note the difference between harming someone and hurting someone.
HURT
When someone gets hurt, it’s temporary. The pain is not lasting. Also sometimes pain is the result of positive forward progress. Sometimes growing hurts. Willing to be wrong and admitting it hurts our pride and ego. Recognizing that we’ve unintentionally been instruments of systemic injustice, pain, and oppression can and definitely will hurt. It’s part of being human. Hurting on its own is more neutral. It can be the result of something good or something bad.
Harm
Harm on the other hand is deeper. It lasts longer. It leaves a lasting impact and it’s not the result of anything positive.
An Illustration of Hurt & Harm
If someone close and dear to me lashed out at me, said mean things, and punched me in my face, there would be both hurt AND harm. The immediate impact of the words and the physical wounds from the punch would be “the hurt”. Yeah it’s painful, but superficial, and that can be brushed off relatively quickly.
“The harm” would manifest itself in the broken trust. The lingering thought that they might snap at me at any given time. The emotional toll of walking on egg shells anytime I’m around them. The haunting echo of their words that perpetuate my deepest insecurities. That is harm. There is nothing good in that.
the potential for harm exists because of free will
Free will makes it so that the potential for harm, suffering, evil, sin etc. is always there just like the potential for good, justice, freedom, hope, and love is always there. We ultimately must choose.
A healthy faith, helps put things into perspective and provides clarity. It may sound repetitive but I will also go back to the criteria established in Part I & II.
Do no harm, do good, love God.
Anything and everything we do can be measured by that. But what we do, is entirely up to us no matter how much we pray and how much we read the bible.
The choice is always ours.
Questions
Have you ever considered the difference between hurt and harm?
This might be challenging, but in reflecting on moments of pain in your life (whether experienced or witnessed), are you able to distinguish moments of hurt and harm?
What are times where hurt was a result of something negative?
What are times where hurt was a result of something positive?
What are times where you caused hurt? Intentional? Unintentional?
Are there times where you may have caused harm (even if unintentional)?
What steps (if any) can you take to remedy that?
If you can’t remedy the situation, what can you learn from it?